I asked for some deep dark nasty play using a known trigger. I love lizzybug with my whole heart but she makes me think evil thoughts. I guess it's good for me because it's dealing with crap from my past and the more I deal with it, the faster it goes away. I'm just worried that I shouldn't do that with Don. I know it hurts him when he deals with the nasties in my past because there is nothing he can do to fix them, or at least that's what I think it does. I don't want to break him. Ya know people laugh when he says he isn't a sadist, but he's really not, he's a service top, a dominant, and a loving partner. The sadist in the house is me :D I can happily play in the darkest nasties spots and draw emotional angst out of anyone and it does nothing more to me than turns me on. I'm a bit of a sociopath. Just a bit though. I have not only embraced that side of myself, I have done so with a great deal of enthusiasm. :D I could post proof, but that'd be tattling.
Monday, October 7, 2013
Sunday, October 6, 2013
same old...
Another day, more stuff processed. Had a punishment and had to have a discussion with Red about the different intensities necessary for me and Lizzy. Meh.. he was plenty intense for me. Fricken Delrin cane..
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